The Cruel Letter Game!

Okay, here’s how this works. Look at the letter format below. First, choose some person to write it to; it can be anyone. Please don’t take this TOO seriously; it’s just for fun and laughs. Now, pick someone you want to write a letter to, and put their name first. Then, go through every question and choose your answer; you can choose whatever answer you want each time, it doesn’t have to always be the same. To whatever you choose, an answer is written for you. Put that answer in the appropriate number space and continue on. When you’re done, post your letter to whoever you’re writing it about. I’ll go first, to show you all how it’s done. It’ll come in the post right after this.

Dear (insert name here),

I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___. I think I realized it ___2___ ___3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm giving you back ___8___, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___ .

___12___,
(Your name)

1. A fire-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Charmander – Our romance is over
Chimchar – I stole your virginity
Cyndaquil – Your butt really stinks
Flareon – I’m joining a punk-rock band
Growlithe – I really dislike you
Houndour – Our horoscopes don’t match
Magby – You’re a pervert
Ninetails – I’m selling myself to science
Numel – Your eyebrows are insulting
Ponyta – You’re wanted by the government
Torchic – I’m in love with your sister
Vulpix – You’re a total loser

2. A psychic-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?

Azelf – When you mooned that entire human city
Celebi – When you spammed that Pokemon website
Espeon – When you sneezed on me
Gardevoir – When you spanked me
Girafarig – When you did the chicken limbo
Jirachi – When I ate your brains
Kirlia – When I threw up
Lugia – When you got shaved bald
Mesprit – When you farted on me
Mew – When you face-sat me
Ralts – When you touched yourself wrongly
Uxie – When you ogled yourself in the mirror

3. A normal-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Aipom – In your trainer’s backpack
Buneary – Under the state of trance
Delcatty – With my clone
Eevee – In a Charizard’s rear-end
Furret – At the mental ward
Glameow – In my humid closet
Lopunny – Under the moonlit sky
Meowth – As you complained about indigestion
Skitty – In the state of New Jersey
Smeargle – With some horrifying Octillery
Zangoose – At the entrance to the ladies’ room
Zigzagoon – While watching naughty and mature movies

4. A dark-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Absol – Hit on
Cacturne – Inspect
Houndoom – Spank
Mightyena – Lick
Nuzleaf – Sniff
Poochyena – Slap
Sableye – Beat up
Skuntank – Insult
Sneasel – Face-sit
Stunky – Castrate
Umbreon – Anal vore
Weavile – Fart on

5. An electric-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Ampharos – My evil clone
Electrike – My best friend
Flaaffy – My favorite vore victim
Jolteon – Ash Ketchum
Luxio – Sonic the Hedgehog
Minun – My stupid brother
Pachirisu – My idiotic sister
Pichu – My pen pal from the United Kingdom
Pikachu – A very sexy Lucario
Plusle – A stupid-looking Slowpoke
Rotom – Miles Prower
Shinx – Professor Oak

6. A dragon-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Bagon – Man
Dragonair – High
Dragonite – Senile
Flygon – Stinky
Gabite – Ashamed
Garchomp – Ugly
Giratina – Weird
Latias – Stupid
Latios – Sexy
Rayquaza – Scarred
Salamence – Masochistic
Vibrava – Pathetic

7. A fighting-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Blaziken – That I’m allergic to your butt odor
Breloom – How boring you are
Croagunk – That I get turned on by Lucarios
Gallade – How embarrassed I am to be seen with you
Hitmontop – That you’ll never score with a hot Gardevoir
Infernape – How using your brain works
Lucario – That I’m cool and you’re not
Medicham – How I really don’t like your armpit hair
Meditite – That I did a sex-change
Monferno – How I really want to be vored properly
Riolu – That you simply freak me out to no end
Tyrogue – How Santa isn’t going to be giving you any presents this year

8. A grass-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Bayleef – Your butt hair
Bellossom – The pictures of your private moments
Cherrim (Sun Form) – Our matching Pikachu bibs
Chikorita – Your ugly toenails
Grovyle – The pictures of that Gardevoir’s butt
Jumpluff – Our peace of mind
Leafeon – Your zombie-like eyeballs
Meganium – The episodes of Bleach and Deathnote
Roselia – Our reservations to Mage’s naughty menu place
Roserade – Your collar and whip
Shaymin – The stalker messages you left on my phone
Shover – Our flat Meowth that we had used as a blanket
Treecko – Your ugliness

9. A water-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Azumarill – Your criminal records
Buizel – Your sister
Chinchou – My common sense
Lumineon – My sexy body
Manaphy – Your left ear
Milotic – Your suicide note
Octillery – My virginity
Phione – My butt scar when you bit my butt
Piplup – Your rights to the Hungry Pokemon site
Suicune – Your pornographic documentary movie
Totodile – Galen and Mage’s disturbing private conversation
Vaporeon – Ash Ketchum’s horrifying battle poses

10. A ghost-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Banette – Will always remember
Drifblim – Told my psychiatrist about
Drifloon – Always felt dirty about
Dusclops – Get sick when I think of
Dusknoir – Am better off without
Duskull – Never openly mocked
Froslass – Never liked
Gengar – Was interviewed by a movie crew about
Misdreavus – Always wanted to break
Mismagius – Will tell the authorities about
Shedinja – Really felt nauseous about
Shuppet – Would love to forget

11. A flying-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Beautifly – Your face-sitting fetishism
Charizard – The plant that looks like a Jynx
Delibird – Your annoying farting habits
Farfetch’d – The weird birthmark between your butt cheeks
Gligar – Your Ash Ketchum imitations
Ledian – The way you giggle and wiggle when you’re excited
Ledyba – Your love for spanking my overworked butt
Murkrow – The time when I allowed you to get me drunk
Skarmory – Your sadistic way of torturing others
Togetic – The way you play with yourself when you’re alone
Xatu – Your childishness
Yanma – The character on Bleach, Grimmjow

12. A steel-type Pokemon who you think is sexy, cute, or good for vore?
Aggron – Go burn in Hell
Aron – Greetings to your freaky family
Bastiodon – In deep pain
Dialga – Get lost
Empoleon – Disgusting regards
Lairon – Your everlasting enemy
Mawile – Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
Metagross – Get a haircut and a job
Metang – Leave me alone
Probopass – Don’t let the door hit you on the way out
Scizor – Go and beat yourself up
Shieldon – Get a life

Dear Rain,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I stole your virginity. I think I realized it when you spanked me as you complained about indigestion and I saw you fart on a stupid-looking Slowpoke. I'm sure you're stupid enough to understand that you simply freak me out to no end. I'm giving you back your zombie-like eyeballs, but I'll keep your sister as a memory. You should also know that I never liked the way you giggle and wiggle when you’re excited.

Good luck on your short-term leave from jail,
Josh

Dear Shadowfang,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I stole your virginity. I think I realized it When you ogled yourself in the mirror Under the moonlit sky and I saw you slap A very sexy Lucario. I'm sure you're Weird enough to understand How using your brain works. I'm giving you back Your ugliness, but I'll keep Your sister as a memory. You should also know that I Will always remember Your Ash Ketchum imitations.

Good luck on your short-term leave from jail,
Aaron Scales

Dear GlAd0s,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I’m joining a punk-rock band. I think I realized it when you did the chicken limbo with my clone and I saw you hit on my favorite vore victim. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that you simply freak me out to no end. I'm giving you back the stalker messages you left on my phone, but I'll keep your sister as a memory. You should also know that I told my psychiatrist about the plant that looks like a Jynx.

Good luck on your sh... (Oh shi- everyone's done Mawile)
Get lost.

Bob.